Help! My Kid Hates Reading

This week, I had the pleasure of interviewing a friend, fellow mom, and fellow educator, Emily Fear. Emily is a teen librarian at the Sewickley Public Library. She is an exemplar of all the things a librarian does. Not only does she provide book recommendations and homework help to local teens, she also has created a safe and comfortable room in the library that was - pre-pandemic, and will certainly be, post-pandemic - packed with teens of all shapes and sizes doing homework, finding books, or using computers.

Emily is my guru when it comes to finding books for students who swear they hate reading and have tried everything. I tell Emily a little bit about the student, and she comes back with a list of suggestions. The list always has something they haven’t tried. Somehow, it always works. Here, I asked Emily to share her best tips for finding a book for the kid who hates reading - and maybe help change the way they think about books.

What questions can I ask my kid to help them find a book?

Find out what they like, not just what they like to read - especially if they don't consider themselves "readers." Are they into specific sports? Is there a particular video game they're obsessed with? A favorite television show or movie series?

I truly believe there is a book for every reader - and that every person can be a reader. Give yourself an advantage by working from a place they're already interested in - so if they like Among Us, find them fun, suspenseful speculative fiction that will tap into the same narratives and themes.

Also think about their routines, habits and attention span. Is your kid the type to focus on one thing at a time for a long span of time? Or is your kid the type to bounce back and forth between projects, activities, with short bursts of productivity? Understanding how long they are able to focus on one thing helps to predict the type of reading they might be more interested in. (So, for a kid who can't concentrate on anything for more than 20 minutes, a graphic novel or short paperback novel might work better than The Fellowship of the Ring.)

Also, try not to get hung up on "age appropriate" reading, especially if the concern is that they're not reading things that are sophisticated enough for their age. Every reader deserves to enjoy what they're reading - so unless it's for a school assignment, it's okay if your 11th grader wants to read the latest Rick Riordan series.

Conversely, if you're concerned that your sixth grader is only drawn to books that are "too mature" for them, try to help them find books with similar subject matter and themes told in a more age-friendly way. (For example, when the new IT movies came out, I had a ton of middle schoolers who wanted to read the Stephen King book. Fortunately, K.R. Alexander's The Fear Zone is a perfectly middle grade-appropriate book with a very similar hook - yes, even the creepy clown.)

What genres and topics haven't I thought of?

DON'T IGNORE GRAPHIC NOVELS! Or graphic non-fiction! If your student is a visual learner, there are soooo many options for them within the illustrated form. Everything from the beautiful, surreal mature "picture books" of Shaun Tan to intense personal graphic memoirs of Marjane Sartrapi, Alison Bechdel, David Small, and others.

As far as topics, again, go back to your student's existing interests. A lot of high school students who gravitate away from conventional novels and narrative storytelling can still find a lot to enjoy among non-fiction that centers around subjects they are interested in. Nurture their interest in various subjects by helping them to find books in those (and related) areas. Even if they only ever glance at them from time to time, it's something they can continue to come back to if their interests deepen and mature.

Also: Don't assume your student doesn't want heavy stuff in their reading. I've had more than a few students over the years who will only read books with super heavy, dramatic themes. Teenagers need catharsis just like adults do. Don't assume the worst if they're reading books with sensitive topics. If possible, use it as a jumping off point for discussion and discovery.

Does it count if they're only reading (webpages, text-based video games, etc)?

Depends on what you mean by "count." Encouraging your student to consider this as reading allows them to avoid the dreaded "non-reader" designation - a moniker that I absolutely despise. (I won't go into the myriad of reasons why, but long story short, designations like these are self-fulfilling prophecies.)

That being said, we get more out of any cultural material we absorb - be it writing, film, music, etc. - when we embrace variety. Variety of topics, styles of writing, formats, etc. Help your student merge their existing interests with new ways to engage with that interest via the written word, be it comic series of their favorite video games, fan fiction of their favorite TV shows, or websites dedicated to research on their favorite subjects in school.

But as far as what "counts", ask yourself what you want your student to be getting out of their reading. Do you want them to be engaged in different perspectives? Do you want them to be building their vocabularies? Learning new ideas?

All reading counts as some form of engagement.

Where can I find someone who will help my kid find a book for free?

At your local public library, of course! Many libraries now have dedicated staff members that specifically work with students in grades 6-12 - like myself - but even if your local library doesn't, chances are there are more than a few staff members available to help your student find a book and/or alternative reading material that will suit their tastes and needs.

If you have a younger student, try not to speak for them when talking to a librarian. The librarian, especially if they are trained specifically to work with that age group, will likely ask your student a series of questions to help narrow down the options. If your student is shy, likely the librarian will have ways to work around that shyness, so try not to chime in with suggestions - especially counter-productive ones like, "He doesn't like to read" or "she only likes so-and-so." Allow the librarian to their job with as little bias as possible.

Also, encourage your student to pick out as much as they want to try at home. If the reading is strictly for pleasure, there's no pressure to finish anything they start. When I make recommendations to students, I pull a bunch of books, introduce them with title and basic description, and let them lead from there. That way, there's no pressure to take the ONE book I've handed them. They get to select from a variety - and possibly take more than one option home.

If their school has a library and librarian, that's also a great place to get recommendations. School librarians are particularly great at finding material that will work for your student's reading level. Your student may not be reading at the grade level they're at and that's OK - their school librarian is trained to understand and work with them where they are.

Have questions? Reach out to your nearest teen librarian! Emily Fear can be found at feare@einetwork.net and sewickleylibrary.org.

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